A forced one.

You know how you come home from work exhausted and decide to take a short nap before starting your weekend? As I was leaving work today I figured I'd do just that before taking full advantage of the cheap drinks at this place near my work. The first part of that sentence worked out just fine. I got home and crawled in bed right after dinner and pretty much passed out only to wake up around 11pm... sucks. By that time, I had ten missed calls on my cell and multiple texts from people wondering why I disappeared. Also, by that time I knew it was way too late for me to go anywhere. But the worst part wasn't staying home all evening. The worst thing is, it is already after 4am and I am still wide awake. I actually went back to bed around 2am and tried to fall asleep but gave up after twenty minutes and got up again. Now I am cranky and frustrated because I know I'll end up sleeping until noon again and won't have time to do anything.
I am also pissed because I cannot manage to find my gloves. I am freezing my ass off every time I step outside but all my effort to locate them have proved useless so far. I know they are somewhere in my room but have no clue as to where. I also know I kept them in my bookcase last winter (don't ask me why I chose a bookcase, it worked for me so let it go), but moved them somewhere else during my spring cleaning and now I have no idea where. I just spent the last hour searching for them all over my desk and drawers, but with no success.
The next thing smart me decided to do was to read some memorabilia that I had kept from high school. It is mostly some letters and notes from my classmates, fun stuff we did when we were bored in class, our wishes to all our teachers on our graduation, etc. Mostly just bits and pieces which still didn't stop me from sniffling through my reading. At the end I realized that if I don't want to break into full-blown tears, I need to stop going through that stuff and so I stashed it away.
Now I really want to go back home. Nothing pumps up one's desire to do anything like memories. I actually have an urge to book the ticket for this spring and get on with it. Unfortunately, my conscious tells me to wait till fall cause it will be the best time to go. For whatever reasons that are mostly in my head, I don't want to go until the summer is over since I don't feel that would be the right time to do so. I am dying to go back though and am definitely looking forward to the day I finally do so. No matter what people keep telling me, no matter what I know in my mind, all that doesn't change it.
I kind of feel like sleeping now and I don't want to keep talking about my future trip cause it's just making me more upset and I don't want to start choking up again or anything... Not literally, mentally... For whatever reasons.